I’m not an advocate of concentrating on the bad stuff. I believe you get more of whatever it is you are focusing on in life, but every now and then I have a wobble. My insecurities bubble up from the depths of my unconscious mind and swamp me in negativity. I am scared of the blank page, scared of the filled page, scared of my plot, my characters, my ideas, my ability, my future… and so the list goes on.
And then yesterday, in the midst of a thunderstorm, I decided to write down all of those things and turn them into a blog post. I started with a list, and the longer the list grew, the more depressed I felt. My creative urges dried up and I was left in the dark, watching the lightning flash, feeling like it was the end of the world.
This morning, I got up, determined to make something of that list and turn it into a long overdue blog post about writer insecurity. And you know what? The minute I looked at it I felt heavy of heart. What was I thinking? You get more of whatever it is you are focusing on in life…
So here’s my new list, the good one; the reasons why being a writer is the best job in the world...
- I get to make up stories!
- Working out new plot lines is fun
- Weaving them together is even more fun
- Getting to know your characters is a challenge
- Every now and again you get a flash of creative inspiration where something just falls into place and it’s as if it was meant to be
- Eavesdropping and people-watching has a purpose
- Everything you hear in real life has the potential to be used in a story
- Researching stuff is cool
- Extending my knowledge and understanding of a subject is a joy
- I go to work in my pyjamas and eat cereal at my desk
- I choose my hours
- My books are published
- People like my books and I’ve had some great (unsolicited) reviews
- People pay money to read my stories
- I have the BEST writing buddies in the world
- I’ve made all this happen
- And I’m going to go on making this happen more, and having fun…
Writer insecurity? Pah, who cares.